Camille Paglia said that "Pursuit and seduction are the essence of sexuality. It's part of the sizzle." Indeed, it's not enough to look good. Showing your interests, flirting shamelessly, using body language: these are all ingredients that make the thrill of the hunt so fun and seductive."
So true--you have to make it a game of hunter and hunted, and YOU are the hunted. I explain this in detail below. So let's look at what a lot of guys do incorrectly in trying to get a woman to bed, and how to correct them with the ways to seduce women:
First mistake: They talk down on themselves
Never, ever talk negatively of yourself. Girls see that as a sign of weakness, and a sign that you can't protect and provide for her. Even if you screw up and drop your drink, do NOT act dismayed and pissed off at yourself for being such a clutz. This only drives the women as far away as possible from you. EVEN if you are a great-looking guy. Confidence and assuredness matter MUCH more than looks to women--yes, even the hot ones!
Instead, have fun with yourself. Stay cool; act as if you meant to do that. For example, if you trip while walking her somewhere, say, "I meant to do that," NOT "Oh, I'm such a friggin' clutz!" Show confidence and belief in yourself. Make her believe that your life goes on without her; you've got so much going on, you're such a catch, that you can deal with rejection. Once women realize that you're not insecure and needy, they'll be happy to give you a chance.
Also remember to be CHOOSY. Nothing shows confidence like asking a girl questions about her OWN career. Instead of being intimidated by her questions about what you do and what you like, intimidate her with your own questions! Show her she can't intimidate you--YOU are the selector, not her! You don't "get a chance" with her--she gets a chance, with YOU!
The thing is, women WANT to earn your respect. They WANT to be challenged, to feel like they earned a man's respect, not got it handed to them on a plate. Challenge a woman, tease her and play hard to get, and you'll seduce her in no time.
Another great way to seduce women is to play games and break her balls. Tease her mercilessly and put her down in front of her friends. This shows both confidence in yourself, and humor. Both of which turn women on greatly. They don't want a guy they can run all over; they want a guy who will PUT THEM IN THEIR PLACE!
This only serves to stir up chemicals in her brain, such as PEA, that make her attracted to you. Talking about seducing women!
On the other hand, don't make the next mistake, which too many guys unfortunately do...
2. They talk TOO highly of themselves
While it's great to show belief in yourself, it's not a good idea to come across as an arrogant jerk. If anything, talking really highly of yourself shows insecurity and selfishness...not ideal characteristics to portray when trying to get a woman in bed.
Get to know the girl...tell her what you like about her. Then start talking sexually: Talk in innuendos, and sneak in comments about how good you are in bed. If she seems nervous or reluctant to kiss, tease her. Tell her, "I bet you're a horrible kisser." She'll want to prove otherwise...so let her!
Golden rule: The first step towards having sex, is TALKING ABOUT IT. This forces a girl to consider the idea...and once the idea of sex is in her head, it won't go away anytime soon! Just don't over-do, and make sure you give her direct eye contact and a knowing, grinning smile as you bring up the idea of a passionate, intimate night...
3. They have bad breath
You can have everything else going right: you're making her laugh, she's into you, you're flirting just right. But if you've got bad breath, how can you expect her to want to even kiss you, let alone go home with you? Guys, make sure you have some Binaca, gum, or breath mints handy at all times.
4. They're not dressed well
This is a simple one. If you look like you just woke out of bed, no girl's gonna be attracted to you. Let alone seduced. You don't have to dress like a model, but you sure as hell should watch what you wear and how you present yourself.
What colors work best? In my course I go through all the best colors for catching women's attention and turning them on, but generally, you can't go wrong with jeans and a white shirt, black pants and a burgundy shirt, or all black if you want to give an essence of cool and rebellious.
Just make sure you're well-groomed! The best clothes in the world won't make up for bad hygiene and messy hair--facial or otherwise.
5. Bad posture/Body Language
Yeah, a little thing like bad posture can go a big way towards stopping your seduction goals. It's really important to sit up straight and have your shoulders back. You want to convey confidence and control as much as you can. Leaning over and not looking a girl in the eye will sabotage your efforts.
For more information on reading female body language and giving off the right body language gestures of your own, make sure you check out my How to Be Irresistible to Women audio course My audio lessons and workbook show you what works, what doesn't, and how to position yourself for amazing seduction success!
6. Bad BO
Bad body odor is definitely a no-no. Guys, wear deodorant!
And don't overdo on the cologne; it's not a substitute for a fresh shower and anti-perspirant, and sometimes, less is more.
7. They get really, really drunk
Yeah, we've all had one of these nights. You drink a little too much (or a LOT too much), act like a creep, get really aggressive, stink of alcohol. All of it combines to drive the girl away. That's not seducing her to bed; it's inducing her to leave!
Instead, show that you don't need alcohol to get a woman to bed. The thing is, really, only YOU can attract women. Alcohol can't make you someone you're not. It all begins with a commitment to developing your foundation: your inner game, your self-belief, your ability to embrace the moment.
One book I highly recommend for getting your foundation right, for developing unstoppable self-belief, is Dr. Alex Benzer's The Tao of Dating. It's an amazing, mesmerizing read that will help you in all areas of life. Check out the website--it'll do wonders for your game, and you'll find you won't need alcohol anymore to feel sexy!
8. They try too hard
Nothing makes a woman want to get bed with you less, than you pushing her to do more. Guys who plead with women to come to bed, grab onto them without their consent, and say really obvious things like, "C'mon, come to my place, it'll be fun," are destined to a night alone. Girls don't want to seem easy; they want to feel like a man earned her body. Thinking a woman will go home with you when you haven't earned it is a quick way to end your night alone.
On the flip side, if you DO
9. They don't listen
Sometimes listening is all you need to do to get a woman excited. Give a girl your ear, and she'll give you her heart. Don't underestimate this understanding her and giving her a chance to be heard! Women are all about building bonds, building CONNECTIONS, so listening her to goes a long way towards making yourself more attractive.
In my How to Be Irresistible to Women multimedia course, I teach you some great ways to use listening as a seduction tool. I teach you about the importance of listening and communication to women, and how practicing these things can make you a VERY attractive man.
Unfortunately, too many guys only want to talk about themselves. That's a bad mistake. Make sure you don't do it yourself.
10. They don't have any confidence
This is the biggest problem. Even when a girl is interested in them, so many guys don't know how to proceed. They think too much about what to do, instead of just relaxing and seeing what happens.
Guys, LIVE IN THE MOMENT. Enjoy what happens--not just talking to the girl, but the whole fun of the atmosphere. Take your mind off the idea of sex, and just relax. That's when seduction happens...when you're not looking for it. CONTROL YOUR EMOTIONS, BEFORE THEY CONTROL YOU!
When women see you're calm, cool, collected and fun--THAT'S when they're turned on most!
For more information about building confidence, becoming a naturally sexy man, and how to make women feel a gut, emotional attraction to you, check out my How to Be Irresistible to Women course. Details below!
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